June 21

It was Father’s Day today. I was sitting at a picnic table beside the river in Kettle River Provincial Park. The sound of the water gurgling by, and the birds singing in the surrounding trees brought a sense of calm to my soul. The incessant mosquitos gave my body fits. I had to put a long sleeve shirt and long pants on to be able to sit in comfort at a table on the banks of a very full Kettle River.

I was on my way to pick up my kid from her Mom. I was excited to see her and reconnect after our time apart. I wanted to share with her stories of my time with her cousins in Winlaw. I wanted to take her canoeing. My brother took me canoeing on the Slocan River the other night and it was an amazing experience. One I wanted to share with my kid. Unfortunately, I couldn’t find anywhere close by to rent a canoe. The story of my experience with her Uncle Luke may have to suffice; for now.

After my rest stop beside the river, I drove fifteen minutes north to meet up with my kid and her mom. I was happy to reconnect with my kid. Too late to do anything of excitement we drove home to catch up with Krista and go see her family for Father’s Day.

Sometimes days like Father’s Day and Mother’s Day can be a set up for disappointment and difficulty. Our young teenage girl has so many things going on her head and her life it can be difficult to focus on her parents and on doing what we want from her. My love for her knows no bounds, my frustration with how things go can overwhelm me. 

I wanted a card, a gift, and time to spend with her. I got the gift; the time was fleeting and the card non-existent. I sometimes find it difficult to control my feelings and emotions; unfortunately, my kid can get the brunt of my angst. She is not always prepared for big days. She failed to do anything for her mother on Mother’s Day and I only fared slightly better. It is hard living in separate homes, and harder still to ensure that everything goes smoothly between them.

I look forward to more time to spend with my daughter. I look forward to days after Covid when my kid returns to school and life returns to normal. Whatever the New Normal will be…