September 12 Goodbye my friend

I held his hand and searched his eyes. I knew he was still there, fighting. Fading… A brilliant light, a life well-lived no longer strong enough to continue. My best of friends, my brother has lost his battle. It was only a matter of time before the light in his eyes went out for the last time.

I take small solace in the fact I got to say goodbye.

Was I wrong to plead for him to fight on? Did it only prolong his pain?

I like to think I did what he would do – give whatever strength I had to help him overcome his date with death. When he said he wanted to die; I refused to listen, I wanted him to live. I wanted him to be there for years to come. It wasn’t fair that he was being taken from us at such a young age. When I hugged him and told him I loved him I feared it was the last time I would be able to say those words to him; it was.

My brother from another mother has gone to the other side. He is out of pain. The only pain left is the one felt by those of us he left behind. I was going to go see him one more time, to plead for a miracle. Sadly miracles don’t happen very often. His stash of miraculous recoveries has been used up. His body worn down by years of pain and injury.

Now he is free from the pain.

Goodbye, my brother, my friend. I know you will be there waiting for me with tales of the fish that got away and the ones we got to keep.