Aug 14-16 Part 1 Family

Family is one of the most important things we have as people and as a society. Family connects us with our past and with ourselves. I am fortunate to have many wonderful people in my family.

One month ago my family lost a wonderful member of our clan. My Auntie Dicky passed away on July 12, 2020, in Red Deer, Alberta. She was a mother of two, a daughter, and a sister of my Mom. Born in The Netherlands just before the second world war, she had a full and varied life and I was better for having her in it. This weekend I went to Innisfail, Alberta to say goodbye and see some family I have not seen in quite some time.

Friday morning we loaded the camper on the truck and headed on the long road to Alberta. With anticipation, we drove east planning to meet my cousins at the Airport in Innisfail. An airport on the prairie, Innisfail is home to flying clubs and a skydive centre. It is a unique place to hold a celebration of life, one that felt very fitting in the days of Covid19. We left only a few hours later than planned, it is typical that we never can get packed up and loaded to leave on time. I could do a whole story on the drive out, suffice it to say we made it to our destination with an hour to spare.

As a kid, I made many road trips from Calgary to Red Deer to see my Mom’s sister and her family. Since I moved to Kelowna the road trips to Red Deer became few and far between. I managed to get my daughter to see her great aunt a few times, but it wasn’t enough. Sometimes in life, it’s never enough. The days of our youth can never be recaptured, but life is short and we make the most out of what we have. I do my best to beat back the feelings of regret. I try my best to stay positive and remember the days we had together.

It was a weekend to connect with family I have not seen in years. Many people I recognized, ripened by the passage of time. I wonder if they look at me the same way? I think time has treated me fairly, a few(?) pounds heavier I know I have changed since I have seen many of these family members. It is a truthful cliché that we only see family at weddings and funerals.

The coronaverse has been cruel to all of us now. No hugs allowed! Yet one of my special aunts smiled, turned sideways, and gave me a social distanced hug. I was thrilled and nervous at the same time. She is over eighty and ‘at risk’ but she just grinned and told me that only a hug would do. I agreed and longed for more hugs. In that moment we reconnected and all the years faded away, I was that young kid and she was my Tante’ with the big smile and dutch accent. If I didn’t appreciate the effort of our nine-hour drive before that moment, I certainly did after it.

Planes landed and took off. Skydivers fluttered in, many landing soft, some landing hard and others missing their mark completely. The airport was alive and I felt my mom and her sister smiling down at us as we all connected in the moment. Clouds came over and kept us in the shade while we had the service and after that, the sun burst forth. In the moments of life, it is times like this we are meant to experience. True connections with our kin was a fitting way to pay our respects to someone we all loved.

Flames licked the side of the metal fire bowl and burst out into the night air. Stars enveloped the night sky. The phosphorescent light danced in the northern areas. A light bursting and dancing, was it the northern lights or a high cloud reflecting the moonlight. Whatever the cause, the effect was magical. I almost forget how all-encompassing the prairie sky can be at night. We were engulfed by the night and the stars. Like a million pinprick holes in the blanket of the darkness. The stars lit the sky and we stood in silent awe absorbing the sight and utter stillness of a prairie night. Five of us watched the flames dance and the sky sparkle and reminisced about days gone by.

In the afterglow of the morning time, we laughed again. None of us have sat up through the night in many a year, my cousins and my Uncle connected on a level we will now carry with us. Bonded deeper and closer. I hope we see each other again soon. Time is precious and we need to cherish these days. Despite the viral threat lingering over all of us we came together in a prairie night and remembered a life well-lived. Goodbye to my Auntie Dicky, she would be proud.