April 4

April 4, 2020

Another sleepless night comes to an end.  I arise to meet the new day.  A slug may have more motivation than I have this morning; it’s a combination of a mild hangover, a lack of sleep and a general lethargy that I am falling victim too.  It has been three weeks of lockdown where we are supposed to STAY HOME.  I had my fiftieth birthday to look forward too  Now we’re in this world where we can’t do anything; I push myself to find a reason, a reason to get up, a reason to get my daughter up, essentially a reason, any reason.  Reason has escaped our society of late, now the whole focus is flattening the curve, beating this bug, I guess that is a reason…

Our daily walks are becoming my sanity, my escape from the mundane.  The three of us go today, back to the top of the hill.  I try to get the teenager to stop and enjoy the view but she wants to push on; boredom attacks the young mind very easily.  Feeling adventurous we walk down the steep dirt road, followed closely by the local dog, he barks at us from his side of the fence as we walk, letting us know he is there; watching.

Enjoying the crisp air and breath-taking views we amble to the local corner store a twenty minute walk away.  Building our connections we enjoy the exertion as we traverse the varied landscapes.  At the corner store we wait while the store clears of people.  I wonder if we will ever go back to trusting each other.  It feels hurtful and awkward avoiding people, maintaining physical distance.  Will this just become normal in time if we have to keep doing this?   Can we recover from these feelings of fear and distrust?  I hope with every fibre of my being that we will come out of this stronger and more connected than ever.

Walking back up the hill for home,  my body rebels while my mind revels in the physical exertion of it all.  We will continue to enjoy our world and we will continue to connect with the nature around us.  I breathe in the beauty of our day, our walk and our companionship.  The innocence of youth that my daughter exudes makes me smile.   She will have many more tomorrows and one day she will truly appreciate all that life holds.  In the meantime, I embrace her innocence and enjoy the simplicity of it all; our cats, our garden, our friends and our home.